the greatest commandment and the greatest things in life

When i was talking to Piggy the other day that i realized that i was afraid of a lot of things. Afraid of failing, afraid of disappointing people, afraid of hurting the people that loves me, afraid of being alone, afraid of changes and lots more...

Part of the fear was the condemnation that i have for myself that i'm never good, or was never good enough. Even in John and Stasi's book called captivating also says of women nowadays are always made to think that they are never good enough...hence women are never really satisfy with themselves...thinking that they are fat even though they are really skinny, think that they are not pretty enough, think that they are not good enough as a women etc.

But thats not what God thinks of us...In the Bible, Genesis when God made the universe and man. He said that it was good, but He felt that something was missing because the man was alone..hence He made women - Eve! The Master's finishing touch. The women who was not only made out of Adam's ribs, or was made in the image of GOD but also made to reflect GOD's heart!

I realised that there is nothing for me to be afraid of! There is nothing should make me feel that i'm not good enough... Especially when i have the LOVE OF GOD in me because in 1 John 4:18 - There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Hence to say that I believe GOD, which also means that I acknowledge HIS perfect love which will sustain me thru thick and thin. Furthermore with the Love of GOD i lack nothing...Looking back my life as a Christian and i can testify that it is true! When you truly love and seek GOD, He just keeps on blessing you with everything. First He bless me by making me understand that i have the BEST FAMILY IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD AND I WILL NOT TRADE FOR ANYTHING FOR THEM. :D I learned what it means to be in a family :) Secondly He bless me with education that i'm able to study masters n provide me the means for it. Thirdly He gave me the bestest friend of all - JANICE which is also my prayer partner :) Lastly He is always there for me everyday when i wake up! He will gently shine down on me in the morning, He will bless me with rain to wash away my tears, He will be the wind gently follow me around everyday. :D

The best part of all...He have already planned out my future for me! :D So that i don't have to worry about the future. As in Jeremiah 29:11-13 - For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to i prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. So what do i have to be afraid of?all i have to do is to seek God with all my heart ;)

And yes I WILL SEEK Him with all my heart :) and also to learn to love HIM back (Matthew 22:37 - 39 - Jesus replied: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.)

Starting from today, i'll challenge myself to SEEK GOD with all my heart and to LEARN to receive His LOVE, GRACE, BLESSING and ANNOINTING. I will also pray to learn to love HIS people... :) and also to learn to love that person that His given me :)

2 Timothy 1:7 - For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.

AMEN!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am utterly speechless!!!annoyed and dissapointed!

I know its a phase which i have to go through to learn and be better person, but i'm just utterly dissapointed in most men and find most of them are just JERKS!

when i tell you to becareful on what you say, please do it!do not say things you dont mean and bring my hopes up...because when you cannot fulfill what you say you will hurt the person that you care alot and maybe to the extend of losing them. If you cannot fulfill things, or have the feeling that you might not be able to fulfill promises that you make...please do not make it!Because people will feel betrayed and dissapointed in you.

I thought that it was just the two of you till P***Y wrote me an email this morning that he has issues and will not be there much for me???What am i now?someone you want to hang out with when you are in a good mood and dump a side when you are having issues?

I guess Janice say is true...you'll learn to know who is true and who is not...I know not all men are jerks look at my bro in law...his so cool and he treats my sis with love and respect...but for now, i'm seriously having a hard time trusting guys again...n P***Y say that i'm bad in relationship, maybe its true...but it was you guys that made me like this...Cause and effect babe...

i got sunshine on a cloudy day ;)

Looking back at my previous post...i realized that when bad gloomy days come and pass...
there will be loads of sunshine :) and the sun is slowly rising in my world :)
Spring is coming..... :D

Ranting!!!

Sometimes people or things just love to remind you how incompetent or annoyingly stupid they can be!!!!

For example today in internet design class, i was trying to create a blog for my assignment and blog spot just shows me how annoyingly dumb they can be!!! They 'CLAIMS' that their HTML are user friendly! FUCK that man!!! YOU ARE SO NOT FUCKING USER FRIENDLY!!!!got me a whole hour playing around with the fucking HTML n IT WORK NUTS!!!it won't let me change into the design that i wanted, it do not let me change zero, it's so not user friendly!!!

Seeing that i am hitting dead end, decided to try out word press...Guess WHAT??? They just another bunch of money suckers!!! I thought i finally found the right web for it but no!!! YOU HAVE TO PAY THE FUCKING THING TO CREATE YOUR OWN DESIGNED BLOG!!!!seriously~!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

The blog thing just ruined my morning!!!dahlah headache on how to design a good and interesting blog, seeing that I'm not a design student!!! Mr.PIG just have to ask the stupidest question at the wrong time!hence upgrading my headache to a migraine!!!

I don't understand why is it that some people have to question everything that you do?cant two people of the opposite sex just hang out and be good friends?why do you have to assume???n think otherwise!?!?!?! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO SPOIL EVERYTHING!?!?!?!?!??WHY DO YOU ALL ALWAYS HAVE TO FORCE ME TO CHOOSE?!!?!?!?!? WHATS wrong with just hanging out????

Now because of your question, i will lose my neutral free comfort zone!!!MY perfect neutral free comfort zone whereby i don't have to put up with this cold war n suspicion n gossip!!!! FUCK YOU MAN!!!!

N MR.PL!!!STOP SAYING THIS THAT YOU DON'T MEAN!!!!

What makes it worst is the STUPID INTERNET keeps disconnecting!!! STUPID O2 with their supposedly really good service n high 8GB speed cant even keep a good smooth connection for fucking 15 MIN!!!! KEEP disconnecting for no apparent reason!!!!!N ITS NOT EVEN THE WEEKEND!!!ITS ONLY THE FUCKING MONDAY WHEREBY NOT MUCH PEOPLE USE THE NET!!!!!! Now i cant even do my assignment in peace without THE FUCKING LINE KEEP DISCONNECTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I warn you guys do not cross me!!!!DONT ever piss me off today or this whole week ever!!!!!N I'M NOT EVEN PMS-ING YET!!!!!!